Pure Love Without Kinship
In this article of mine, I wanted to talk about “the family structure” that everyone is talking about. I will talk about how this “family structure” term can be various and how LGBTIQ+ individuals do not harm this structure contrary to what is believed. Of course, it is not necessarily needed for one or one more child to be involved in the family. However, to explain the subject I would like to mention better, I want to give this data from UNICEF which reveals that in the world, almost ten thousand children are orphaned every single day and there are 140 million children who are orphaned in total. This number is estimated to be much higher.
Being a parent means that taking the responsibility of taking care of and protecting a child until (s)he reaches a certain age. To be honest, while there are so many orphaned children, I don’t think it’s right for people to bring another child into the world for their egos, with discourses such as “(s)he should be my own flesh and blood”, “true love requires a biological bond.” I can also say I find it “controversial” because the way of having a child is a subjective decision. However, what we should not forget is that humans already are doing almost everything for their own benefit even if we do not realize it. That’s why when the topic is bringing a new child to the world, it means the situation is not one-sided. I do not think blood ties would be deficient when you sacrifice some things for someone, love someone without expecting anything and become a parent. Thus, we can say that it is pretty normal for families started by heterosexual or LGBTIQ+ individuals to adopt a child. However, for some reason, when queer individuals adopt a child it is claimed by some parts of the community that child’s psychology might be affected in a bad way or “the family structure” of the society might be spoiled.
What I do not understand is that people assume everywhere is as homophobic as the country we live in. Of course, there is homophobia among the “universal” problems and discriminations; but there are also some other countries where this situation is not as much of a problem as in ours. Thus, a child who grows up in a society, where already there is no bullying and no gender for love, won’t be mentally depressed. This child’s psychology might even be affected in a good way since (s)he will have a family that loves him/her unconditionally instead of growing up alone.
Apart from this, I don’t think that this specific part of the society, which causes discrimination in the community by claiming these ideas, really care about those children’s “psychology” or the “family structure” they see as sacred. If that’s the case, I’d like to ask why they do not talk about how the couples who don’t love each other or couples that are forced to marry might affect their children in a bad way. Likewise, I wonder why they attribute the breakdown of family structure to not being heterosexual. Although we are one of the countries where the most traumatising events for children such as murder and rape are experienced, I would like to ask why these do not disrupt family structures. The concept that we call family is a diverse thing, and no one’s “sacred structure” can be destroyed in mutual love and a conscious safe environment…